We believe in adoption. Every month we see beautiful families created. But there are times when we would discourage
Six Bad Motivations for Adoption
Rescuing a child.
Children need a parent who wants them, not a parent who wants to be a savior. If you think you’re a savior, that attitude will permeate the relationship and no one, especially a teen, wants to feel eternally grateful. Children do not want to feel they “owe” you something for adopting them. No child wants to be a charity.
You’ve finally convinced your partner.
No. No. and No. Both of you should be ready to add to your family.
Adoption is different; it is not second-best. Until you truly believe that, don’t adopt.
You think this will save your relationship.
Children actually put more strain on a relationship. Expecting a child to fix a relationship is unfair to the child and, quite frankly, unrealistic.
Those people pressuring you aren’t going to be feeding the baby at 2 in the morning. Those people pressuring you aren’t going to be trying to remember to send a sack lunch for the third-grade field trip. Those people pressuring you aren’t contributing to the insurance fund when the 17-year-old hits a parked car.
You want an heir.
Wanting someone to care for your estate or care for you as you age is not a reason to bring a child into your home.
Look inside and make sure your decision to adopt comes from a good place.