Searching for Biological Roots
Searching for Roots: An Adoptee’s Quiet Journey Toward Truth
Alexander’s search for his birth mother wasn’t about replacing family—it was about understanding identity.
There’s a shift that happens quietly.
It’s the shift from curiosity to feeling like we need to know.
This was a subtle shift for Alexander. But when it happened, it could not be ignored. It felt like a weight.
The Moment the Questions Began
He didn’t always think about being adopted. At first, it was just a fact. “I just knew I was adopted,” he said. But as he got older, the unknowns crept in.
“You start to think about it. You start to wonder why.”
Alexander wanted to know more. Not because his family wasn’t enough—but because there were pieces of himself he couldn’t quite place.
“You want to know where you came from, who your parents are, who your birth mom is.”
Reaching Out Through Letters and Agencies
As an adult, Alexander reached out to his biological mother through the adoption agency. He waited. She didn’t reply.
The silence didn’t dull the questions. If anything, it made them louder.
The Emotional Weight of the Unknown
He says he wasn’t ever angry. There was just a quiet longing.
“Maybe she didn’t want to be found. Maybe she didn’t feel ready,” he said, letting the space between questions be filled with compassion.
Still, he wondered. Still, he waited. “She might not know what to say. She might be afraid of what I think.”
These weren’t assumptions. They were a soft attempt to understand a silence that felt personal.
Learning to Carry Two Truths: Biological and Adoptive
Being adopted means living in two stories. The one you were born into and the one you were raised in Alexander holds both, not with bitterness, but with honesty.
“I’ve always been curious,” he said. “I’d still love to meet her. I don’t know what I’d say, but I think I’d just tell her thank you.”
That’s the thing about curiosity—it’s not always about answers. Sometimes, it’s just the desire to stand in the presence of truth, even if it hurts a little.
And Alexander is still open to that.
Even now.
