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Waiting to Be Matched–Do This Correctly

“Wait well.”

This is an invitation to those who have completed the home study process and have officially received approval to adopt.

There is no way to establish with any accuracy how long your wait will be.

Here is the time that you “wait well.”

This means you concentrate on self-care. Wait in a meaningful way. Connect as a couple, find activities that bring you joy, prepare your home and your heart.

Also, this is a time to seek out information about adoption. You should get a jumpstart onto what women feel when they “give up my baby.”

We don’t feel they should even say, “give away my baby.” We want them to know that they are placing a baby in a secure location—not giving a baby away. Now is the time to understand adoption from the birth mother’s perspective.

If you anticipate a transracial adoption, now is the time to enlarge your knowledge on this subject. It would help if you lea about racial identity and the significance of being raised by a person of another race.  Now is the time to locate multicultural resources in your community. Find potential barber shops or hair salons. Investigate the racial demographics of possible places to live.  Reach out to community leaders of color to become more involved in the community.

This will take you out of your comfort zone, a small sacrifice compared to what the birth mother is doing.

Here are a few other steps you can take:

  • Look for books that show adopted children and families in a positive way.
  • Find out how to file for the tax credit after you adopt.
  • Find out about your company’s “adoption leave” policy
  • Educate friends and family about adoption and positive adoption language.
  • Find support groups or playgroups for adoptive families in your area.
  • Read everything you can.
  • Exercise so you can care—lift, carry—for your new child.
  • Find local pediatricians and childcare options.

Wait well.

Start your journey here.